Waiting For Marriage

 

Waiting For Marriage

For many ladies around the world, it is not always easy to remain patient when it comes to waiting for marriage. Especially ladies like myself, who have remained single for a number of years. The single season isn’t a smooth road for those who seriously desire to be devoted wives, homemakers and mothers. Although, in my single season I have finally learned to not despise the journey throughout the wait, and rather immerse myself deeply into it from a place of joy and resting in God’s faithful love. Initially, this was not my response. In my earlier years of my waiting for marriage, I tried everything within my limited power to change my life. But after years of trying to do everything my way, I eventually came to a place of surrender.

Wholehearted submission to God as a single christian woman may seem frightening at times, because as humans, it’s often out of the ordinary to relinquish our control. But I realised that all of the worrying, all of the stressing, and all of the fear that comes with comparing my timing to other women, and watching my biological clock tick away as the years go by was just not helping. I was immersing myself in fear, rather than resting in faith that God is good and faithful to do what is best.

In the period of waiting for marriage, God has also brought my soul to a place of serenity and trust. To the point where I no longer see the benefit of worrying about how, when or where it will happen. And I know that many single christian women like me, have the tendency to do the same. We worry that if we don’t do enough, or if we don’t try hard enough, nothing will ever change. And what makes matters worse, is that we are often told by so many individuals that we ought to ‘get ourselves out there’ and ‘look for someone’. Initially, I tried that and followed the advice, but it only resulted in my heart breaking further.

Once I reached my breaking point of trying to do everything in my own strength, I felt the tranquility and serene love of the Lord wrap me in His arms. I began to just let go and delight myself in Him with all my heart. I began literally applying the scriptures to my everyday life. I ensured to dwell on His Word, day and night. Because I realised, at any moment there will come a time where things will occasionally arise to discourage you during your waiting season. Through which, the Word became my solid foundation to keep me strong in the midst of quiet disappointment and uncertainty.

I learned to be happy again, without worry or concern troubling my heart. For I knew that every detail of my life rests in the loving care of His hand. I came to understand, and fully believe that God can indeed do anything at any time. I have also stopped speaking with certain individuals regarding my single season for advice. Because while there may be some people who have good intentions, their advice may not always be biblical, or what God wants you personally to do.

Surrendering as I remain waiting for marriage throughout my single season has enabled me to grow closer to God on such a deep, beautiful and intimate level unlike ever before. Rather than being so quick to seek out the advice of others, my heart has drawn so much closer to the Lord and delving deeper into His Word.

Relinquishing my control as I submit to Him, has also resulted in Him destroying idols within my life that I once thought validated me and made me feel secure. In my discomfort, He has allowed me to truly experience rest and satisfaction in Him. Obtaining strength through His Spirit and His Word.

In moments of loneliness, I come to Him. Waiting for marriage often involves many times of loneliness for most women. There are many times where I would often try to escape this loneliness through trying to saturate myself with distractions, just to hide away from the feeling of being lonely. However, the gracious Lord Himself has been so kind to remind me during those moments, that He is always with me. There’s never a moment where He is not beside His single daughters. Ready to listen, willing to comfort, with open and wide arms to receive us.

In the discouragement I have disciplined myself to look to the Lord, and not my circumstances. I have even learned to praise and worship Him, even when it seems like He is far away in my life. There are times when my pillows are soaked with tears, and my heart is drenched with pain, but I still praise Him anyway.

Waiting for marriage is an interesting journey. Though it can be challenging, I feel as though it can be a place of refinement when one is willing to surrender to the timing and process God takes you through. And I know that for many women, it can be discouraging. Whenever I see someone much younger than me enter into her season of marriage, I have often asked myself ‘Why me, Lord? Why must I wait this long?’. But then I am reminded of Ecclesiastes 3:11, that He makes all things beautiful in it’s time. And in the meantime, I can trust, and I can rest, as He blossoms me beautifully in His love. Because God has a purpose for everything. Even in the moments where we cannot see, nor understand. His ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts, much greater than our thoughts. Surrendering to the almighty God in my season of waiting for marriage has seemed like a rollercoaster. But in the midst of it all, I have clung on every second to God’s hand. And there has never been a moment where He has failed me. And I pray that you can trust, that He will never fail you too. He loves you, ardently, fervently.

Thank you for reading!

If you delighted in this post, I think that you will adore Why I Desire To Get Married and 30 Ways To Be Your Husband’s Helper

My beautiful books are also available to purchase internationally on Amazon

 

Lots of love, Devona

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2 Comments

  1. April 22, 2022 / 11:47 pm

    Thank you for this post! It is so encouraging to read that someone else has similar experiences and convictions because, as you said, there are so many voices out there that say “you are not doing enough, etc…”
    Two scriptures that I have encouraged my heart with in this season of singleness are Isaiah 60:22 (At the right time, I, the LORD, will make it happen) and Psalm 127:1 (Unless the LORD builds a house, the work of the builders is wasted). I don’t want to get so caught up in worry and insecurity that I try to accomplish His promise on my own and then end up with an Ishmael. Leaning into Jesus is key in this season.
    Thank you so very much for sharing your heart! I always look forward to reading your posts.

    • devonafayana
      Author
      April 24, 2022 / 7:23 pm

      Awww, it is my pleasure Melodie! I’m so pleased that this post encouraged you ♡. Thank you for sharing those scriptures, they have certainly encouraged me too during this season of waiting! I truly understand what you mean about not wanting to take matters into your own hands, out of worry and impatience. Looking to Jesus is something that I am trying to remain steadfast in too, and as I surrender, it has become such a beautiful journey. Thank you again for your lovely comment! And thank you for reading! God bless you abundantly ♡

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