For a long time I have been battling with being a perfectionist. Some people take perfectionism lightly but it’s far from that when you actually have to deal with it yourself daily.
I had always had an eye for detail no matter what the situation or event was, I ideally would like all things to be done orderly and at a high standard of excellence but of course, I know life doesn’t work out that way many of the times. Most of the time I’m okay with it, unless it’s to do with my work or appearance.
I believe the main reason for this is my role in the beauty industry. I have worked in the industry for many years now and over the years I have come to understand that in this particular industry and the jobs I have worked in, there is little to no room for mistakes, slack and little effort when it comes to painting your face to their idea of perfection. You are required to wear makeup daily without fail when working and if it’s not up to standard, usually you would get told about it.
Even when it comes to doing someone’s makeup or hitting commission targets, sometimes a lot of stress and pressure can arise which can possibly lead someone becoming a strong perfectionist in all things without realising it. And truly, I personally don’t think perfectionism is a bad thing a lot of the time, there’s nothing wrong with wanting things to the best possible standard but it’s only bad if you let it overwhelm you and get to you. That’s what happened to me. Once I developed it in my work life, I began to see it develop in the rest of my life in general. With friendships and even with my faith journey as a Christian.
I came to a point in my life where I had reached my breaking point and had to really let out to God about everything. I had to daily give my worries, cares and anxieties to Him. Once wasn’t personally enough for me but daily. And through that it’s as though a bit shift of heaviness comes off me. I left the weights of it all at the feet of Christ and allowed Him to restore my soul. Times like this humbled myself to remember that we as humans are not perfect, but Christ alone. It taught me to understand that it’s ok not to be perfect because the reality is, we aren’t. Only God is. And the truth of this matter really helped me to move forward.
God is so good, so kind, sweet and loving. Without Him I think I still would be in overwhelming states of not being perfect or doing perfect things. But thank God that He is faithful to help us and guide us when needed.